The Grand Odalisque or just
The Odalisque
is the Intimate Live Jazz Club
above beautiful downtown Mooresville, Indiana
laGrandeOdalisque
is located above beautiful downtown Mooresville,
Indiana and offers you the chance to briefly escape
from the horrors of beautiful downtown Mooresville,
Indiana. With every step up the worn, wooden
staircase, your troubles, the worries, the sirens,
the hurting and the punching and the thing and the
hey lady and the other thing, magically melt away.
laGrandeOdalisque
offers unique dining experiences. From our deck, gaze
upon majestic herds of blue wildebeests or the giant
stepped ziggurat* or see a breathtaking birds-eye
view of the back alley, the dumpsters and the
building across the street.**
Or you can watch and mock our nerdly karate neighbors
in their silly little pajamas as they clog the
streets and alleys with their little spinning moves,
their plastic knives and swords, their little squeaks
and yells and their little colored belts. What fun!
And since our overly oppressive city regulations only
allow 1 person to occupy our building at once, you
are assured of the most intimate of experiences.***
Enjoy live jazz music, cuisine and moderately good
times in a not so much claustrophobic, as a possibly,
more intimate setting, in a decor which can be
described as not too much midwestern but probably
somewhere else, where they speak French, mostly.
laGrandeodalisque,
where our motto is not "smoke-free" but "freely
smoke." Unlike some other Morgan county
establishments and despite overly obtrusive city
and/or county ordinances, we allow all major brands
of cigarettes to be enjoyed in blissful nicotine
splendor. Our separate and hermetically-sealed
Russian Army surplus air recirculation system means
that not a single whiff of smoke can escape to offend
politcally correct denizens. Neither can any air
enter the confines of
laGrandeOdalisque,
thus never diluting the thick clouds of billowing
tobacco smoke with oxygen. Simply climb our 2 story
staircase and enjoy. There is a landing with a chair
halfway up so that you may catch your breath before
attempting the last leg of the ascent.
Finally, since
laGrandeOdalisque
is adults only, there is no need to worry about those
pesky, loud, annoying pre-pubescent individuals who
seem to be everywhere. Parents, we know you love your
kids, but others probably do not feel the way you do
and really, its adult time up here. Those who have
made the lawfully and arbitrary 21 solar orbits or
more and still possess all of the other
above-mentioned attributes may still be present,
however.
Thank you for virtually visiting
laGrandeOdalisque
from your comfortable surroundings on this, the
world-wide Intra-Web. We look forward to virtually
seeing you sometime in the virtual future and perhaps
one day, even seeing you here at
laGrandeOdalisque
above beautiful downtown Mooresville, Indiana.
*requires
you to bring your wi-fi enabled laptop computer,
appropriate web-surfing thingys and an available
Inter-Web connection. Alternate views from the net
may be available depending on where you surf.
**a computer and connection are not needed for this
viewing option as this is what's actually behind us.
***Maximum occupancy is 1 (one) person for the 3500
square foot building. City fire codes require you to
wear fire-proof asbestos underwear (rental underwear
available at The Odalisque). A fire extinguisher and
water hose will be held at you, at the ready, by our
crack staff in case of fire. The city fire
departmwent will have a fire truck at the ready in
the alley at all times. For your protection and at
any time, our Halgon-B fire supression system may be
activated, spraying you down with foam. Please wear
stain resistant or water proof clothing. Any
flammable or possible flammable materials on your
person will be confiscated and placed in an
hermitically sealed EPA metal drum and disposed of in
the flame-proof Mooresville Landfill. You may pick up
your items at the end of your stay at The
Odalisque.
__________________________
Welcome to Mooresville, Indiana,
No Longer Under Federal Quarantine!
© 2007 theGrandOdalisque.com